When I was a member of a Catholic Monastery, we ran a retreat center for all of the various "Anonymous" groups. Our facilities could hold up to 65 visitors. Each week, we would have a whole new set of people come to get away from their regular routines to find the support they needed to help them "restore themselves to sanity" (Step 2) and to "turn their will and lives over to the CARE of God" (Step 3). All day/night long, they would have a marathon of meetings where a tremendous amount of Healing took place, through the fellowship of the Anonymous programs.

The "Guardian" of my monastery (the head monk) was an admitted Alcoholic and actively participated in the AA program. As Guardian, it was his role to instruct the younger "monks-in-training" to learn about and progress in the Spiritual Life. Although there are incredibly important "Doctors of the Church" who were experts in Spirituality (my favorites... St. Teresa of Avila, St. John of the Cross and St. Thérèse of Lisieux), it was our Guardian's belief, after having been a monk for over 50 years, that the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous was the most powerful, practical approach to growing in the Spiritual Life! Although it was not required of us to learn about and attend meetings, he highly encouraged us to do so. He would say, "If you don't want to do our monk schedule, you can go to the meetings for fun." Well... even though I have never done drugs or have been drunk in my life, I decided to check it out, and I ABSOLUTELY LOVED IT! The 12 Step can bring about PROFOUND HEALING and either introduce people to Spirituality or Reconnect people to it.

These Steps can be followed by anyone, regardless if they are an addict or not. The first step saying "our lives had become unmanageable" can mean for the non-addict, that their lives had become a jumbled puzzle that was too hard to figure out how they got there and what to do next. To the addict, only they can fully understand how unmanageable it has become. Where the word "Alcohol" or "Alcoholic" is used in ANY/ALL of the Anonymous literature, just replace those words with what you're struggling with... Crystal Meth, Cocaine, Food, Gambling, Marijuana, Narcotics, Nicotine, Sex etc. 

The 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

If you are READY to Live a Sober, Peaceful and Loving Life, do yourself a favor and look into the various programs below. Some people participate in more than one program because they have multiple addictions or they may also need Alanon which supports those people in addictive relationships.

12 Step Anonymous Programs​

• AA – Alcoholics Anonymous
• ACA – Adult Children of Alcoholics for those who were raised in alcoholic and other dysfunctional families
• Al-Anon/Alateen, for friends and families of alcoholics, associated with AA
• CA – Cocaine Anonymous
• CLA – Clutterers Anonymous
• CMA – Crystal Meth Anonymous
• Co-Anon, for friends and family of cocaine addicts, associated with Cocaine Anonymous
• CoDA – Co-Dependents Anonymous, for people working to end patterns of dysfunctional relationships and develop functional and healthy relationships
• COSA – a friends and family group associated with Sex Addicts Anonymous
• COSLAA – CoSex and Love Addicts Anonymous, for friends and family of people with a sex or love addiction, associated with SLAA
• DA – Debtors Anonymous
• EA – Emotions Anonymous, for recovery from mental and emotional illness
• FA – Families Anonymous, for relatives and friends of addicts
• FA – Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous
• FAA – Food Addicts Anonymous
• GA – Gamblers Anonymous
• Gam-Anon/Gam-A-Teen, for friends and family members of problem gamblers
• HA – Heroin Anonymous
• MA – Marijuana Anonymous
• NA – Narcotics Anonymous
• N/A – Neurotics Anonymous, for recovery from mental and emotional illness
• Nar-Anon, for friends and family members of addicts
• NicA – Nicotine Anonymous
• OA – Overeaters Anonymous
• PA – Pills Anonymous, for recovery from prescription pill addiction.
• RA – Racists Anonymous
• SA – Sexaholics Anonymous
• SAA – Sex Addicts Anonymous
• SCA – Sexual Compulsives Anonymous
• SIA – Survivors of Incest Anonymous
• SLAA – Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous
• SRA – Sexual Recovery Anonymous
• UA – Underearners Anonymous
• WA – Workaholics Anonymous

If you need help working the 12 Steps, traditionally you should find a "Sponsor" who is active in the program you need help finding Sobriety in. If you are not ready to attend your first meeting, I'm willing to help you learn about the Steps and guide you in the Steps until you find a Sponsor to help. The "Program" is YOUR program, so you need to work it the way you want to, BUT, as they say in all the meetings, "It ONLY works if you WORK IT!"

Please email me at [email protected] if you want me to help you work the Steps and provide you with Life Coaching and/or Spiritual Direction... My own approaches to help you reconnect to your Spirituality and HEAL the past wounds and traumas that you're still carrying with you. In your email, please share your circumstances and what type of help you need.  Until then... PEACE and LOVE Always - Paul

My DEAR FRIEND Maribeth died this March after a fight with Cancer. She was a smoker and I asked her if she had any words of wisdom for people... "If you're a smoker, STOP NOW, and if you're not a smoker, DON'T START!"

Maribeth was HILARIOUSLY funny, ALWAYS UPBEAT and just one of the best friends you could ever want to have! She was a computer expert (haha) who had such a magnetic personality, she literally had to have her computer replaced every couple of months because her energy would fry the machine! lol.

Maribeth my dear... if you have any free time now, I wouldn't be opposed to you helping me out once in awhile... I need all the help I can get!!! Go and find Virginia... my Grandmother... the two of you will really have a lot of fun together!!!!

THANKS for all the memories my friend... LOVE YOU!!!

: )

Perhaps you can find it in your heart to make a donation today to one of these groups...​

• American Lung Association
• Susan G. Koman Breast Cancer Foundation

Your help is greatly appreciated!!!